I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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