it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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