honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I just cut my nipple shaving
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We need a shit load of segways right now
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Randomize