hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Naked. naked and bneed help.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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