babies were throwing up all over the place
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize