hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize