Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
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The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
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I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
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