i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Randomize