I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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