every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize