I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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