thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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