Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Acid is not a monday night drug
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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