Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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