Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize