I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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