my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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