dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
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want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
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I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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