when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize