I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
did you just send me my own nude
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
COCAINE IS GR8
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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