I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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