I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
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the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
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Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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