My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize