her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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