Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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