yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize