Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
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We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
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Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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