then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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