she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize