they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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