he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize