I want you more than these girls want KFC
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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