smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
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He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
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Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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