Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I wish you could order shots online.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize