do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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