I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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