Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have feelings that need drinking.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize