yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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