I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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