Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize