i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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