he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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