I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
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