dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
Randomize