she woke up with a sticky ear
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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