Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize