i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
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