Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Randomize