you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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