LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize